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Eric Kozlik is a senior this year. In his old age, he plans to take up knitting, canasta, and gumming Werther's hard candies. He is currently deciding between plot 756, which receives a good deal of foot traffic on Sundays, and plot 903, which boasts a lovely view of the tool shed. He thinks he would prefer a maple box to pine, and will not deign to be placed in an urn on some pretentious mantle. These mysteries and many others will be pondered over tonight's blue plate special.

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